petition to make Americans google “euro” before writing fic
If you can roll up a coin you deserve to snort coke imo
tag credit to @teashoesandhair
love that this caused so much controversy the thread needed to be locked. over chicken sandwich
gang this does not even scratch the surface
Someone posted a picture of a piece of chicken between two hamburger buns titled "Chicken Burger" to /r/food. Another user commented "Chicken Sandwich" on the post, and was slapped with a 30 day ban by the mods. When they responded to ask why, the mod said
"Correcting someone in public is public shaming, on top of being incorrect, it's a pretty shitty comment to leave."
So now /r/food is on lockdown after being spammed with posts titled "Chicken Sandwich" and other variations. The mod that handed the ban down pinned a post doubling down, comparing the situation to "Pride posts that always fill up with bigots" and "removing racists from posts featuring POC", and including a link on "how to correctly, correct someone."
because someone commented "Chicken Sandwich" on a post titled "Chicken Burger".
I could be wrong but what’s interesting to me personally is that Elijah wasnt just mad, he was scared for his life cuz there was a queen who wanted him dead so Elijah ran and told God he wanted to die because he was in such anguish
But God is so good and He always knows what we need!
Notice too that he didn’t even give Elijah some encouraging words to comfort him. He just told him to eat. Sometimes just being there and making sure someone gets through their anguish is enough.
AND THUS SPOKE THE CREATOR OF THE UNIVERSE
“Why don’t you have a some food and maybe you’ll feel better.“
And God said, “Have a Snickers.”
And Elijah inquired of the Lord, asking “Why?” and the Lord replied, “Because thou doth lament greatly when thou art hungry”.
Thus Elijah took and he ate of the confection, finding it to be exceedingly satisfying.
The Lord then asked, “Art thou better?”, and Elijah replied, “Indeed Lord, I am better”. Then the Lord further advised Elijah, saying unto him, “Thou art not thineself when thou art hungry”.
quality religious jokes, people
I sound like a squeak toy with how I’m laughing
hey, genuine question *most inflammatory bad faith sequence of words you could ever imagine*
Did you know I actually completed the Tour de France once, and with a better time than the winner that same year?
Yes in my car. Of course. The challenge of riding a bicycle for a thousand fucking miles isn’t relevant to the Tour of France or the Story of the Mountain.
Wait why are you all leaving?
imagine being this wrong and also hiding this article behind a paywall
one time they went to a bbq as a kid and a grill ran over their mom
as much as the concept of Jesus being a fairly normal lad has its charms, im personally very intrigued by the idea of him being just… extremely weird. not even in a mystical sense, just…….staggeringly BIZZARRE.
you go to the well to get some water, and here’s Miriam’s boy, staring at the sky, completely still. his expression is unreadable. you hazard a hello and ask how he’s doing, and he slowly, unblinkingly, lowers his gaze on you (he’s 8 and is missing his frontal teeth, not that this is making you any less uncomfortable) and says “I cannot speak of the state of my being, Nathan son of Saul, my brother, but rejoice for the water you shall take today will be as pure as the soul of the children of Heaven”
…you start sweating
normal person in 1st century Nazareth: making my way downtown, walking fast
*sees J boy, 8 yo, staring at you from across the street*
normal person: walking faster
even funnier, the only person 100% on board with his Prophetic Kid Talk is his mother Miriam, an otherwise placid, absolutely normal woman around 25 or so
kid JC, coming home at twilight, a single white dove following him and chirping with weirdly human-like precision:
moth̫́er,̦͌ ̮̉i h͙̉av͔̽e ͓͗b̘̃r̞̓o̮͘u̲̒gh̟͒t̺́ you a do̗͐ṽ͙e̢͘ ͈̾m͒͢a͈̽dē̝ ỏ̘f ͈̓c̆͜l͔̂aỷ͇ aṋ̑d̳̿ g͢͞i̹̾fted̖͡ ̻͐it ͓͂w̖̿it̎͜h t̥̃h͙͒e ̨̒m̧̂i̡̍ŗ͒â̫cḷ̔è̤ ̛̻of̞̅ l̘̈i̛̦fè̳
Miriam: ! that’s my little boy :) now let’s go get ready for dinner :)
her husband Yosef, a carpenter who only marginally got signed up for this:
This post is so Christian, but it’s the spicy kind of Christian that gets you murdered by other Christians for heresy, so I’m torn.
literally biggest form of compliment i’ve ever gotten
that means the angels are babysitters then
here have more
You guys really need to read Christopher Moore’s Lamb, if you haven’t.
Always reblog Cryptid Jesus
I made more. cause it’s fun
I love that you guys used their actual names
I did not consider Eldritch Baby Jesus.
Post: [discussing real world violence with real world repercussions that often leads to the harm or death of real fucking people]
Fandom Police:
